Friday, January 14, 2011

Questions, Questions, Questions

This should have posted a week ago, but I couldn't access my blog!

Questions. questions, questions 

Now that Christmas and the rest of the holiday season is over, the results of the genetic testing is once again in the forefront of my mind. For the time between December 23 and January 3 it was fairly easy to not think about it because we knew nothing was going to happen during that time anyway. 

Now it's the end of the first week in January and I'm getting antsy again. I don't want to be thinking about this so much, but it just feels like things are still so unsettled. I sent an email to the genetic counselor on Wednesday, but haven't heard back. That gets frustrating as well - not getting a response. Most likely she has nothing to tell us, we are not her only clients, and no doubt there are people in more serious situations than we currently are. On the other hand - this is serious for us. Will anything change if it is finally confirmed, that yes, Mike does have Lynch? Who knows. Probably not.We have already made some changes. Did you know that the spice turmeric gives EVERYTHING a weird almost neon green/yellow hue? Yet, it is in nearly everything we prepare for dinner now because it is a potent anti-inflammatory and may help inhibit the spread of cancer. It's a minor change, but a change nontheless.This evening I decided to check out again. It's been a while since I was on their message board. Tonight I was again reminded of how fortunate I am that Mike is now healthy and that his cancer was found when it was. There was a post from a woman who was married on August 9, 2010 and on August 23 her husband was diagnosed with stage IV colon cancer. He died in his sleep early this morning and now, just 5 months after pledging to spend their lives together, she is a widow.

Who knows why things happen the way they do. I can ask all the "why" questions in the world, but never be satisfied. There are no clear answers for any of it. Now it's Friday night and I know nothing new will come up over the weekend so I will go back to my "life goes on like normal" routine until Monday morning when I again wait for the results from the genetic testing.

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